Intertwined within the book are the "Friendship Tapes," various interviews with other people about their feelings in friendships. I’ve long been a fan of Elizabeth Day’s books and podcasts and the premise of this really intrigued me, it’s a kind of memoir about the beauty of friendship and what happens when it goes wrong. Because, like Day, I see being a good friend as involving always being there, regardless of how I’m feeling. The tendency to quote Day's conversations with friends verbatim adds more bloat to an already bloated book. Based on the number of times I had to pause because of the tears streaming from my eyes, I think it must be.

On this document (you could have it laminated) you would list what you can and can’t offer a new person in your life. Or, as Day’s friend “Sathnam” puts it, hanging on to friends you don’t like is hardly a compliment to the people you do since “it means you’ll be friends with anyone who’ll have you”. And Day is the best possible guide: funny, moving, helpful and true, Friendaholic deserves a massive audience. It's a testament to the popularity of Friendaholic that I put it on hold at the library as both a hardback and an audiobook. I’ve already bought this for several people and recommended to others and all are finding it an insightful read.Anyway, that’s where I am, I don’t need to join or create any other groups and yet, I still acquire more friends, all of whom I’m incredibly grateful for. Romantic partners may come and go, but the ability to tell yourself that you have a lot of friends, some dating back to kindergarten days, is a psychological lifejacket like no other.

In India, the Middle East and Southeast Asia, people reported having three times the number of best friends as those in Australia, Europe and the US.This book absolutely hit the spot for me, and it’s been a long time since a book has got me this good. Perceptive, compassionate and filled with relatable insights into all that is beautiful about friendship, with its most valuable point being that it should be about quality, rather than quantity.

I’ve thought lots while reading this about my friends, and about how I act as a friend, and came out of this reading experience feeling I better understood what friendship means in my life, how to be a better friend, and with more conscious gratitude for my friends than I have had in some time.When one is longing for a family, the effect is profound, it can be hard to be around children, when you’re grieving for something. As a journalist, she has written extensively across many titles, including T he Observer, The Times, the Guardian, New York Magazine, Harper’s Bazaar, Vogue, Grazia and Elle . I can sense that she will be routinely criticised for being a wealthy white women trying to explore her friendships in a first world country where she wants for very little. Unfortunately, for me, the book is most interesting where it is least like a confessional and most like a scientific exploration of friendship.

The trouble is, she continually tries to draw universal conclusions from her own (again, very specific) experiences. Her chart-topping podcast, How To Fail With Elizabeth Day, is a celebration of the things that haven't gone right and won the Rising Star Award at the 2019 British Podcast Awards.It can be quite a minefield at times especially as you get older, but also I know what I want from friendships these days, so I suppose it’s a bit easier in some ways. My only real problem with this book (other than the fact that I didn’t think it was possible for a person to have THIS many friends), is the amount of tangents and metaphors packed into each chapter. From ghosting and frenemies to social media and seismic life events, Elizabeth leaves no stone unturned. Which gets at the other big limitation of the book for me, the outright dismissal of male-to-male friendships.