This book had a profound effect on me, however, of the negative variety. It did give me pointers on how to actually break out of my shell and "win friends" but in the long term, it did way more harm than good. Not the book per se, but my choice to follow the advice given there. The book basically tells you to be agreeable to everybody, find something to honestly like about them and compliment them on it, talk about their interests only and, practically, act like a people pleaser all the time. Dale Carnegie began his career teaching night classes at a YMCA in New York, [ clarification needed] later expanding to YMCAs in Philadelphia and Baltimore. [7] He then taught independently at hotels in London, Paris, New York, Boston, Philadelphia, and Baltimore, [ citation needed] writing small booklets to go along with his courses. [8] After one of his 14-week courses, he was approached by publisher Leon Shimkin of the publishing house Simon & Schuster. [9] Shimkin urged Carnegie to write a book, but he was not initially persuaded. Shimkin then hired a stenographer to type up what he heard in one of Carnegie's long lectures and presented the transcript to Carnegie, [10] who edited and revised it into a final form. [11]

The result? The tenant concluded that the only honorable thing to do was to live up to his lease. By appealing to the tenant’s nobler motives, the landlord was able to persuade him successfully.Distrust our first instinctive impression. Our natural reaction to a disagreeable situation is to become defensive. We should keep calm and watch out for how we first react. Carnegie explains that he once attended a dinner party where he met a botanist whom he found to be absolutely fascinating. He listened for hours with excitement as the botanist spoke of exotic plants and indoor gardens, until the party ended and everyone left. I would love-love to read the original text in all of its (I'm sure) outdated glory, but I suppose that will have to wait for another day.

En la parte final se cuenta la vida de Dale Carnegie, y entonces es allí donde sentimos más simpatía con el autor porque comprendemos que es igual que nosotros, con sus problemas, sus sueños y dificultades, y que es un gran ejemplo a seguir porque lo que él hizo fue seguir su pasión para dedicarse de por vida a lo que siempre deseó hacer: Ser un conferencista. Es una historia muy bonita que me ha gustado mucho, la he releído varias veces —incluso en este momento mientras escribo esta reseña—, y entre más la leo más me encanta su historia de superación.Praise things others do right and minimize their errors. Give encouragement and others will desire to keep improving. H)Why, oh hwhy, did I read this?! Carnegie’s principles display, boldly, the many wrinkles of their age but it’s not only that; it’s very hard to believe that this book/course was ever considered useful information, nay, even anything beyond laughable, by any self-respecting individual! Reading between the lines and paying attention to the biographical details you realise that Carnegie never was a successful salesman himself. Success only came late in life when he was teaching an evening school class on the topic of how to win friends and influence people. His students would share their stories about changes in thinking or attitude which had changed their lives, these then made their way in to the book. Once the book was published readers would send in their own stories which were added to later editions.

Mr. Doe, I have listened to your story and I still don’t believe you intend to move. I sized you up when I first met you as being a man of your word. Take a few days to think it over, and if you still intend to move, I will accept your decision as final.” Better give your path to a dog than be bitten by him in contesting for the right. Even killing the dog would not cute the bite. Remember, and relentlessly repeat, the victim’s name during conversation. That sweet, sweet nectar that is one’s own name will have them eating out of the palm of your hand. A man convinced against his will is of the same opinion still. A misunderstanding can be resolved by tact, diplomacy, conciliation, and a sympathetic desire to see the other person’s viewpoint instead of argument.

My Book Notes

The most successful leaders all have one thing in common: They've read How to Win Friends and Influence People. Which would you rather have, an academic theatrical victory or a person’s good will? You can seldom have both. What we want to do instead is get the person saying “yes” as soon as possible. This starts the person moving in the affirmative direction where no withdrawal takes place. Our opponent now has a very accepting, open attitude. Buddha said, “Hatred is never ended by hatred but by love,” and a misunderstanding is never ended by an argument but by tact, diplomacy, conciliation, and a sympathetic desire to see the other person’s viewpoint. If you want to win friends, you have to do it the hard way, by being yourself and risking rejection (and daring to do some rejection of your own, as well). And if you want to influence people the only fair way to do it is through honesty. All the rest is manipulation and pretending. Do not read this book, you'll only learn how to manipulate yourself & others. Do not read it out of fear of rejection & low self-esteem, there are better ways to gain some courage in approaching people. This will harm you in the long run.

How to Win Friends and Influence People is a self-help book written by Dale Carnegie, published in 1936. Over 15 million copies have been sold worldwide, making it one of the best-selling books of all time. In 2011, it was number 19 on Time Magazine's list of the 100 most influential books. How to win friends and influence people’ is one of the best self-help books I read in 2018. It’s a very popular book that I managed to avoid for years simply because I thought it might have cliché advice that I’d probably already know and I won’t find anything useful. Boy, was I wrong! It definitely has pieces of advice you probably have heard a million times already, from your parents, teachers or just any adult; you listen and get inspired for like 15 minutes but you don’t spend time pondering on it and it’s forgotten. I guess you need to be in a certain state of mind to absorb opinions and ideas. This book had me in that state and was able to hold my attention throughout. Next time you approach a disagreement with someone, take a moment to imagine yourself in their shoes. If you were that person:The principles are divided into four major parts in How to Win Friends and Influence People. Now, let’s discuss the principles one by one. You can’t win an argument. You can’t because if you lose it, you lose it; and if you win it, you lose it. Why? Well, suppose you triumph over the other man and shoot his argument full of holes and prove that he is non compos mentis. Then what? You will feel fine. But what about him? You have made him feel inferior. You have hurt his pride. He will always resent your triumph and “a man convinced against his will is of the same opinion still…”