In the Chinese culture, it is common for the new mother’s mother-in-law or own mother to live with her for a month after giving birth to help with the baby and to cook for her. Before I had my second child, my mom also told me “not to cry as much” because it was bad for my eyes (due to the tears affecting my hot/cold balance).

For Asian women, did you participate in the one-month sitting period, and if so, how did that affect your postpartum recovery (both positively and negatively)? As a second-generation immigrant teen immersed in white culture, I was baffled by my Asian family—my grandmother’s harrowing war stories, my mother’s laser focus on achievement. To anyone watching, the message was clear: Asian American motherhood was a trend that could pass, not an identity to be represented. As the growing pressure to be beautiful gets even heavier in Asia, is it right to pin these expectations onto mothers as well? Moms] aren’t allowed to say, ‘I want to text with my friends,’ or, ‘No, I don’t want to watch you draw.Aimee – It's interesting for me, as well, to hear about your perspective as an Anglo-Australian dealing with an Asian MIL. I moved out of state in the middle of my pregnancy and my old OBGYN never mentioned that big of a life change could throw me for a loop.

While American Pie has made the idea of a MILF (you can look that term up if you don’t know it) a run-on joke since the 90’s, China seems to take this concept very seriously. It's kind of her way to be a bit guarded and constantly second-guess herself if she's somehow intruding. Also, I completely know what you mean about the Asian culture being open to "alternative medicines" but skeptical about modern medicine. I understand the emotional restraint aspect-African Americans practice something similar, we do a lot of "bootstrap" pulling, not taking time to focus on how we feel, deciding instead to just "get over it. I would make plans about who the best person would be to leave the baby with until my husband came home, how I would send child support without being located….Racism had become more permissible, more palpable than ever before, and I didn’t want to confront what had happened; I wanted to bury it. I was always told what happened in confinement, so during my pregnancy I was sure that I would be fine as mum would be there.

It's funny how cultures that are so different from each other (Asian versus African American) can also have some distinct similarities. This defiance in the face of my own negativity is something I’ve been practicing for a few months now. Today we’re so happy to welcome Cat, a Chinese-American Warrior Mom, who blogs at Postpartum Thoughts. When I was pregnant with my first child, I received all the standard prenatal care: frequent OB visits, lab tests, and ultrasounds. To see her daughter again, she must pass motherhood tests with a robot daughter who is transmitting data about her parenting—how long she maintains eye contact, the length of her hug, the spark in her stories.

At this year’s Oscars, Everything Everywhere All at Once is in the lead with eleven nominations, including Best Picture, Best Director, Best Actress, Best Supporting Actor, and Best Supporting Actress. Because all of us need to see our experiences reflected and to be reminded, once again, that we are enough. When Billy's first dating attempt with a Japanese girl goes terribly awry he feels his chances for romance are lost forever.